So don’t stare at people at the urinal next to you and they won’t react defensively.
react defensivelyreact defecatingly
react defensivelyreact defecatinglyreact deafeningly
I was at a bar, good ‘n’ drunk, went to take a piss. Bathroom is small, one urinal, one pot. I’m pissing away and I let a fart slip out, not a big one, just a good booty burp. The guy who’s back in the shitter raising a putrid stink has the balls to say “gesundheit”.
I wish I were that witty.
The most inpolite way to express politeness.
Once I was in the bathroom of this upscale theater following a Shakespeare play, when a very sharply dressed older man who exuded an aura of intelligence came in and approached a urinal. He dropped his pants and underwear all the way to the floor, raised his shirts with both of his hands and held them above his exposed nipples, then pushed his hips as far as he could into the urinal to piss hands-free. The incongruity of what I was seeing left me stunned, and made me forget to pee until he had completely left the bathroom.
Good push!
Rain happens without thunder all the time tho
Look at this guy, calling bullshit on Fleetwood Mac
Are you gonna argue with a pants shitter?
I’m gonna make eye contact and shit louder, with DETERMINATION
with DETERMINATION
“I HAVE DETERMINED THAT THERE’S SHIT IN MY PANTS!”
-pats approvingly-Ohh no, you don’t want to start a shit off!
Gotta establish dominance.
Re-establish, you mean
I also frequently piss without shitting myself, yet here we are.
I also sometimes piss without shitting myself.
Why?
Incontinence.
Not for the guy at the urinal next to you
Oops, now it’s a mudslide.
The best part about shitting yourself at a urinal is that you’re already in a bathroom so you can clean up.
The worst part about shitting yourself at a urinal is that you shit yourself.
My 60 y.o. Dad with dementia … he knows he can go piss in a toilet. But he also knows he can just piss himself and his nurse will take care of it. It’s definitely a situation where an accident turned into a lifestyle choice lmfao
i’ll pee into the shower if i want to
There are two types of people in this world. Those who piss in the shower, and liars.
Into bud. Into.
You know that’s not better.
If you don’t want to be in the thunderzone leave a 1 urinal gap
That’s how you get beyond thunderzone.
I can never pee beyond thunderzone because Tina Turner is so intinadating.
I just piss in the sink, to be safe.
Sink pissers rise up!
You guys must be tall.
Nah, i usually use the kids washroom cause their sinks are lower
I am 6’4 but most sinks aren’t that high anyway.
Well share your weed then
I use a bottle
…in the store down the road.
I mean, you were staring at him for no reason before he started talking. You should give him a tip for giving you a show!
I read that as “before he sharted”
I’m leaving this here. Have a nice day.
